1. |
Not Good Enough
02:40
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I'm not good enough but
Everybody loves me.
Do they know what they're
Missing out on?
I'm not good enough
But everybody loves me.
Do they know that they're
Missing out?
From the desk
Through the rest
It has festered.
I have never quite
Kept up with the future,
Unsure of which of all the
Rows of sutures
Borders the ends
Of the child and the adult.
I'm trying not to be unsightly
But that's hard when you're unsightly
To yourself, and when you
Hate the way you act when you're relaxed.
God please make me faultless.
I'm not good enough
But everybody loves me.
Do they know what they're
Missing out on?
I'm not good enough
But everybody loves me.
Do they know that they're
Missing out?
I'm an issue
That needs to be corrected.
I have never quite seen
Past the mistakes I've made,
Unsure of which of all the mistakes
Most urgently needs covering up.
I feel like one big blemish,
Not just in my skin,
But in the way I act
And in the things I
Say when I have let my guard down.
God please make me faultless.
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2. |
The Pinnacle
03:34
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I am sickened by my own chords.
I am fighting with my keyboard.
Another juvenile attempt at progression.
I feel around for an A note.
I review the tune that I wrote.
Another mediocre nod to expression.
Just five more steps until the pinnacle.
My pathway is my only obstacle, obstacle.
I'll keep praying for a miracle,
But I've become a little skeptical.
I can feel it all in the back of my head,
But I can't find it on the keys, and
I can hear my song, but I can't make it play.
There are more notes than I can fit in my hands.
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3. |
Running On Empty
03:42
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You got them running on empty,
And they've never been full.
You got them psychosomatic.
You got them out of control.
We may never find out the truth
Until we die and go to hell.
And we may never escape the truth,
And if we did, could we even tell?
Am I an animated human rib?
Am I a being with a Goddess within?
Am I just a character
In a hurt/comfort fanfiction?
You got them running on empty
And they've never been full. (Never been full.)
You got them psychosomatic.
You got them out of control. (Out of control.)
We fall into the Gateway Trance.
We cry for simple
Like a pop song dance.
We fall into the, fall into the Gateway Trance.
We cry for simple
Like a pop song dance.
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4. |
The Bitter Song
04:52
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Good luck with all the friends you've made.
Congratulations on your big mistakes,
Now go take their breath away.
They stood in line to watch you die,
But you'll surprise them all
When you survive,
Now go take their breath away.
Go take their breath away.
I could have been lonely by your side.
I could have been a friend you could bitch to
And you could have been mine.
But you just had to choose to
Go inside
With everyone else.
I thought we were supposed to
Boycott togetherness that night...
...Together.
Standing in the rain.
We laughed about how we were too
Good for the higher plane.
But you just had to choose to
Go dry off
With everyone else.
Now do you think that you're too
Good to be depressed with me all night?
Just answer me this:
How can you close your eyes
And sleep away your nights so peacefully
While I watch the world with
One eye open all the time?
'Cause I do that to survive.
I do that to survive.
Good luck with all the friends you've made.
Congratulations on your big mistakes.
Now go take their breath away.
They stood in line to watch you die,
But you'll surprise them all when you survive.
Now go take their breath away.
Go take their breath away.
It isn't a matter of apology.
But maybe I would look at you again if you'd
Apologize to me.
But please don't do it, 'cause you
Didn't do
Anything wrong.
I'm just hurt because you
Let them all accept you for who you are...
...Without me.
Look at what you made
Me do. How could you just live without me
While I was too afraid? And you,
You answered honestly when they asked you,
"Is anything wrong?"
I'm just grossed out that you
Poured out all the anger from your heart.
Just answer me this:
How can you close your eyes and
Drink in all that love so happily
While I walk around with
My soul sealed off all the time?
'Cause that's how I live my life,
In that left-out state of mind.
Good luck with all the friends you've made.
Congratulations on your big mistakes.
Now go take their breath away.
They all placed bets on how you'd die,
But you'll surprise them all when you survive,
Now go take their breath away.
Go take their breath away.
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5. |
Body Image
01:14
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Weighing myself when I'm hungry
'Cause that's what I do
'Cause I can't bear to see
What I weigh when I'm full.
Killing my hair
And making it green on my head
It is dead, but at least
It is cool to be seen.
Should I wear the fat as a statement?
Should I draw on arrows pointing to the faults?
Should I put on brown color contacts?
No one would know!
It would be my little secret.
Exercising while I'm spaced out
'Cause that's what I do,
'Cause then I can check out
And come back in an hour.
Curling my hair
In tight little knots
On my head. Now it's red
'Cause I got really bored of the green.
Should I wear all black as a statement?
Should I put on gloves covering the sores?
Should I put a hole in my underpants?
No one would know!
It would be my little secret.
Weighing myself when I'm hungry
'Cause that's what I do
'Cause I can't bear to see
What I weigh when I'm full.
Torturing my hair
And bleaching it white on my head.
It is dead, but at least
It confessed to the crime.
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6. |
Hedonist
04:15
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Just a hedonist
Who takes pleasure in being kind.
It feels so good,
Lighting up those little
Neurons of my mind.
I do things for you
'Cause making you happy sets off those
Hormones that I crave.
Altruism feels so good.
That's how they conditioned me to behave.
Ooh
I feel it in slow motion when I bless you.
Ooh
And deep inside I hope my selfless acts impress you.
Ohh
My love for loving you is passionate and timeless.
Ohh
I want to touch your hips with random acts of kindness.
And it hurts me
To see anybody suffering.
And it pleases me
When they're not.
And I do not like their suffering
Because I do not like what hurts me.
I want to please
Because it pleases me a lot.
Just a hedonist
Who takes pleasure in being kind.
It feels so good,
Shocking all those little neurons in my mind.
I give things to you
In exchange for dopamine
I always want more of.
Being loving feels so good.
How else would creatures have learned to give love?
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7. |
All I Wanna Be Is Right
02:03
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All I wanna do is
Things correctly.
All I wanna be is right.
But it's not an easy
Path to take.
You gotta try
With all your might.
So I grab a drink
And I grab a snack
And I snuggle in real tight.
And I settle for being
Fucked up every night. (Oh, every night.)
Oh, I've got a reason, got a reason to be,
I've got a reason to be proud of me.
But for every reason that I have to be proud,
Fifty other reasons come yelling in loud:
"You're a cowardly, miserable,
Manipulative asshole,
Two-faced, stuck-up,
Beat-down, pitiful.
You deserve to die because of
Everything you did,
Even all the stuff from when
You were a kid."
"You deserve to die."
Oh, oh, oh,
I've got a reason, got a reason to be,
I've got a reason to be happy with me.
But for every reason to be satisfied,
Fifty other reasons make me
Wanna go hide:
"You're a dumb-ass, fat-ass,
Awkward little bitch
Without a college degree
For the adult world, which,
As it happens, is a world
That you'll never learn to navigate.
Too bad, you suck.
You'll be homeless at this rate."
"You deserve to die."
Oh-uhn-uhh--
All I wanna do is
Things correctly.
All I wanna be is right. (That was a mistake.)
But it's not an easy (That was a mistake.)
Path to take, (That was a mistake.)
You gotta try (That was a mistake.)
With all your might. (That was a mistake.)
So I grab a blanket (That was a mistake.)
And I turn out the lights (That was a mistake.)
And I snuggle in real tight. (That was a mistake.)
And I settle for being (That was a mistake.)
Fucked up every night. (That was a mistake.)
Oh, I settle for being (That was a mistake.)
Fucked up every night. (That was a mistake.)
Oh, I settle for being (That was a mistake.)
Fucked up every night. (That was a mistake.)
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8. |
By All Means Smoke
03:34
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Reach for the sky.
Give it a try.
It's not a promise
You're gonna survive.
It's not a promise
That you're gonna die.
But everyone knows
That everyone has.
By all means smoke, but
Don't cut yourself.
Don't cut yourself.
Don't cut yourself.
By all means smoke, but
Don't cut yourself.
Don't hurt yourself
Unless it's for sex.
By all means smoke, but
Don't cut yourself.
Don't cut yourself.
Don't cut yourself.
By all means smoke, but
Don't cut yourself.
Don't hurt yourself, except
Go ahead and smoke.
Reach for the sky.
Give it a try.
It's not a promise
You're gonna survive.
It's not a promise
That you're gonna die.
But everyone knows
That everyone has.
(Please stay thin)
But don't starve yourself.
Don't throw up
But please stay thin,
And don't be a douche who
Lives at the gym,
But please stay thin, but
Not too thin.
Please stay thin
But don't starve yourself.
Don't throw up
But please stay thin,
And don't be a douche who
Lives at the gym,
But please stay thin, but
Don't stay thin.
Reach for the sky.
Don't cut yourself.
Reach for the sky.
Don't cut yourself.
Reach for the sky.
It's not a promise.
Don't hurt yourself
Unless it's for sex.
By all means smoke, but
Don't cut yourself.
Don't cut yourself.
Don't cut yourself.
By all means smoke, but
Don't cut yourself.
Don't hurt yourself, except
Go ahead and smoke.
Reach for the sky.
Give it a try.
It's not a promise
You're gonna survive.
And it's not a promise
That you're gonna die,
But everyone knows
That everyone has.
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Lace Veil Illinois
I write, sing, play, record, and mix the songs myself. I do not have much experience, or a good microphone. If you buy a song, that would help me get a better microphone!
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